


i just felt emotion and i'm not ok with it

by rinthegreat



Series: Texts From Last Night [15]
Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, M/M, background souharu, continuation of the series, this is the end of part 1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 13:00:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14473281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinthegreat/pseuds/rinthegreat
Summary: Rin heads back to Australia.//End of Part 1/Arc 1 of the TFLN series!





	i just felt emotion and i'm not ok with it

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JemTheKingOfSass](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JemTheKingOfSass/gifts).



> thanks for the prompt [Jem](https://twitter.com/TheCandidParent)!! This is the end of Part 1 of this series. Had I known what would happen, I would've made this a chaptered fic. Part 2 likely will be.
> 
> as always this is unbetaed, blah blah...

The weekend in Iwatobi passes in a blur, ending with Makoto’s forehead pressed against the plane’s window as he wills himself not to get upset. No one’s at the airport to pick him up, just like no one had been there to see him off. That’s what he gets, he supposes, for leaving without warning and coming back the same way.

Sousuke, though, texts him while he’s still on the train.

**Sousuke:** _Dinner at my place_

He types out three different replies before deleting them all and keeping Sousuke on read, at a loss as to what to say. Rin would laugh if he were here to see it, but he’s back in Sano spending time with his mother and sister and fat cat, Steve, who had immediately taken to Makoto. Rin had scoffed and muttered “ _Of course he likes you_ ” while Gou snickered in the background.

Makoto drops his head. He misses Rin.

There are three knocks on his door barely twenty minutes after Makoto gets his shoes off, and when Makoto opens the door it’s to Haru’s unamused face.

“Haru?” he asks, looking down to see Haru carrying a bag filled with groceries. “What is that?”

“We’re going to Sousuke’s.”

“Ah, I don’t –“

“Come on.” Without waiting, Haru turns and heads out. The thought of not following doesn’t even cross Makoto’s mind. He tugs on his shoes and rushes to catch up. And that’s how he ends up at Sousuke’s house for dinner that night, where Haru cooks for them both and snaps at Sousuke to leave him alone every time the larger man enters the kitchen for a ‘glass of water’. It takes Makoto’s mind off Rin temporarily, and he finds himself enjoying the night.

The week passes the same way the weeks leading up to Rin’s visit had. They text constantly, to the point Makoto has to leave his phone on silent to avoid being glared at by his classmates. But he can’t help it; he loves Rin. Talking to Rin, Makoto reminds himself. He loves talking to Rin.

And being with Rin.

On Thursday, Makoto meets Rin at the airport and can’t keep his hands off him the whole way back. He does his best to remember what Sousuke had said to him after their double date – and several times during the week – about keeping the PDA to a minimum. He at least keeps his hands in safe places: Rin’s back or elbow, his knee when they sit.

Rin is more daring.

They barely make it in the door before Rin’s on him again, just as urgent as he had been back in Iwatobi. Makoto isn’t any better. He kisses Rin harder than he means to, presses his fingers so forcefully against Rin’s thighs they might bruise.

After the first time, they curl up on Makoto’s couch, which is far too small to fit them both. Makoto lays on top of Rin with his head on his chest, listening to his heart beat. Rin’s fingers card through his hair, relaxing him.

The thought of not having this tomorrow night makes Makoto’s heart clench. “Rin?” he asks before he can stop himself.

“Hmm?” Rin’s other hand strokes down Makoto’s back, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake.

He swallows. Rin will press him if he doesn’t ask, so there’s nothing for it. “What happens when you go back?”

Rin doesn’t ask what he means. “We’ll need to arrange date nights,” Rin murmurs, as if he’s thought of this more than once. “It might not be the same each week, but we need at least one a week while we can, because when the season picks up, it’ll be harder.”

“Date nights?”

“Video dates. We’ll eat together. Maybe more if you’re comfortable.”

Makoto frowns a moment before the meaning settles in. He presses his face into Rin’s chest to ide the burn over doing something like _that_ , and Rin laughs.

“We’ll message every day,” Rin continues, not embarrassing Makoto any further. “Like we were this past week. And we can do phone calls more often.”

“When will I see you again?”

“The only time I know for sure is New Years,” Rin tells him apologetically. “I don’t know about the other breaks yet. There might be meets, but I have to qualify.”

It’s not the answer Makoto wants to hear. Not even close. But Rin’s dream is swimming, and Australia is closer than America. He wants that Olympic medal, and Makoto suspects that a few more months training with his team in Sydney will pull him past a majority of the Japanese swimmers. Especially with his drive and talent combined.

Rin’s fingers disappear from his hair, tapping his shoulder instead. “Are you okay?”

“Mmm…” Makoto hums a sound he intends as assent but comes out more as a groan.

“We can make it work,” Rin promises, squeezing his shoulder. “It’s not forever.”

It doesn’t have to be forever. It could be a week, a month, a year, until Rin’s done with his swimming career…It doesn’t matter. Makoto wants to be with him.

But this, he knows, is because he and Rin are new. He’ll get used to it, and everything will be fine. It’ll all work out, and the two of them will be so busy with their respective lives that it won't matter what country either of them are in. It’s hard now, but it will get better. Makoto believes that. No, he _knows_ that. But it doesn’t stop him from pressing his lips into Rin’s skin.

“Let’s go to the bedroom,” he insists.

They spend most of the night taking advantage of the fact that they’re together, only sleeping a few hours before Rin’s alarm alerts them that it’s time to wake up. Even then, they indulge themselves just one more time.

Makoto’s clingy all morning. He doesn’t leave Rin’s side as they shower and brush their teeth, he keeps his arms wrapped around Rin’s waist as Rin makes breakfast using the groceries Haru had shoved into the fridge a few days prior, and he doesn’t let go even when they eat. If Rin’s annoyed, he doesn’t show it. Instead he seems to revel in the attention, leaning into Makoto’s touch and pressing kisses to the nearest skin.

It takes them longer to leave than they’d planned, and they’re late to the train station. Rin misses the first train by two minutes, which spirals Makoto into a panic.

“I promise,” Rin reiterates, “that I told you one train early for this reason.”

“Is Makoto panicking?” Sousuke asks, announcing his presence. He lifts his fist to bump against Rin’s as they arrive. Haru hovers just behind him, feigning a bored expression that Makoto sees through easily.

“We’re late,” Makoto apologizes immediately. “Sorry.”

“We’ve been waiting for thirty minutes,” Haru deadpans. Makoto opens his mouth to apologize again, but Rin scoffs.

“You have not. I saw you walk out of the subway one car ahead of us.”

Sousuke snorts, but one glare from Haru has him donning an innocent mask. “You’re not late,” Sousuke assures him. “This is when we planned to meet.”

“You told them a different train?” Makoto asks, and Rin flushes.

“He did,” Sousuke confirms. “Assuming he told you the one that just left.”

Makoto turns to Rin, who expertly changes the subject by reaching forward and tugging on the necklace around Sousuke’s neck. “You still have this?”

“I’ve been wearing it since you gave it to me,” Sousuke tells him somewhat impatiently. “Just because you were too busy looking at something else…”

“Sousuke!” Rin protests, face flushed.

Now that Rin’s pointed it out, Makoto recognizes it. It’s Rin’s old necklace. Something warm settles in Makoto’s stomach at the knowledge Rin had given that to Sousuke. It reminds him that Rin has more than one reason to come back. And when Haru steps forward, gazing intently at Rin, Makoto knows there are at least three things in Tokyo and three things in Sano which will keep Rin coming back time and time again. He shouldn’t worry so much.

“We didn’t race enough,” Haru announces, displeasure clear on his face. He thrusts his hand out, shoving some cloth into Rin’s chest. “This is yours.”

Rin catches it before it can drop and frowns down at it. Makoto recognizes the top of the pattern in the center. It’s one of Haru’s old shirts. His favorite one. “No it’s not,” Rin tells him, frowning.

“It doesn’t fit me anymore,” Haru argues, but Makoto knows he’s lying.

Rin’s frown transforms into something softer as he looks back up at Haru. “Thank you.”

Sousuke looks between the two of them. “I just felt emotion, and I’m not okay with it,” he declares.

Rin, who had been tearing up, pushes against Sousuke’s chest. “Shut up.”

Over the intercom, the train to Narita is announced, breaking up the moment. Rin has less than five minutes to get downstairs before the train arrives. Makoto’s heart sinks. He glances over at Sousuke, who gives him a significant look, then turns to Rin. “I’ll walk you to the platform?”

Before, Rin would’ve insisted that he didn’t need help getting to the platform, but now, Makoto knows he’s just as loathe to leave as Makoto is to see him go. So Rin keeps his hold on Haru’s shirt and hoists his bag over his shoulder. “Let’s go.”

“Come back soon,” Sousuke says. “Or we’ll be forced to visit.”

Rin shoots him a sharp grin. “If you can find your way there.”

Before an argument can follow, Makoto nudges Rin towards the stairs, and the two of them head down to the platform. The train hasn’t arrived yet, giving them a few moments, and Rin leads him to a less crowded area.

“You really should visit,” Rin tells him. “If you can.”

Flights to Australia are expensive, especially considering how much Makoto has already spent while Rin was out here. Regardless, he already has plans to beg his parents for a ticket along with high hopes he can drag Haru along, since Haru’s already been once and gets cranky when he hasn’t raced Rin in a while.

“I’ll miss you,” Makoto says instead of telling him that. He reaches out, wrapping his hand over Rin’s where it clutches Haru’s shirt. “I wish I’d thought of something to give you.”

“You gave me plenty,” Rin assures him. “I’m going to be too embarrassed to swim for a week.”

Makoto blushes. He’d been a bit overzealous this morning and had left markings all over Rin’s chest and back. “Sor-“

“Don’t finish that,” Rin warns.

Lights and a familiar high pitched sound announce the arrival of the train along with their last chance to say goodbye. “Makoto,” Rin says urgently, stepping forward. “I’ll text you every moment I can. And I’ll call you when I land. I promise.” He looks close to tears again, so Makoto wraps his arms around Rin, pulling him close. Rin smells like his shampoo, and Makoto almost cries.

“I’ll miss you.” It’s the only thing he can think to say.

Rin sneaks a kiss to his neck before pulling away, eyes rimmed red. “I’ll call you,” he repeats. The two of them sound like broken records.

Makoto wants to hold him close and force Rin to stay, but instead he lets Rin step away. Rin opens his mouth once more before closing it with a hard swallow. He nods at Makoto once before turning sharply on his heel and heading onto the train.

Makoto waves after him, watching Rin through the window until the train disappears. His arm drops to his side after a minute, and Makoto stands there staring at the tunnel until Sousuke and Haru come down and remind him that he has class.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the end of part 1! 
> 
> Part 2 will start with prompt 50 and continue promptless until further notice. Thank you to everyone who contributed and followed this series to this point! No promises on timing of part 2 since I have some other fics I need to work on first per my new years resolution. i really ought to finish at least 1 of those first...
> 
> [Tumblr](https://rinthegreat.tumblr.com/)   
>  [Twitter](https://twitter.com/rinthegreat_ao3)


End file.
